Weekly Rhythm #6: Inside a family talk on young love

Welcome to the Weekly Rhythm!

We’ve been talking about family culture and rhythms, but an important conversation came up this week.

There is a massive amount of trust needed in a relationship and the reason for this is how one person affects the other. If two people are not seeking the ultimate good for their spouse (and not for themselves), then a relationship can go sideways fast.

Coming from the angle of our conversation, a wife has massive sway over her husband. A small gesture or word of encouragement which communicates her belief in him and affection for him can carry a man for a long time. In the same way, a cold shoulder or show of contempt will crush him for years.

I absolutely hold to a man being responsible for himself and those he’s entrusted with regardless of anyone else’s actions. They may not be his fault, but they are his responsibility. This will either be amplified or restricted by the woman he has chosen to let into his life.

The conversation we had was that as they leave our care to become women of their own families, our girls must be the kind of women who their future husbands can trust to build them with their words. For our boys, they must be very careful who they give their affections to. Whoever they marry will either help or hinder their mission in life.

You’re not going to be the perfect spouse, the perfect parent, or the perfect child. There’s a ton of advice out there, including what you’re reading here. Test it all and find out what’s built on a solid rock that doesn’t waver or change with the winds of culture. Build a family culture that lasts. This starts with the conversations you have with your kids.

For you to think about this week:

1. Consider what actions of others affect you more than strong trade winds in the sails of a great wooden ship or a hurricane force winds on a small kayak.

2. Are you hopeful, determined, resentful, or fearful?

For you to act on this week:

1. Don’t ask your spouse if your actions make them feel a certain way. Evaluate your actions for yourself, compare them against whats true, change what tears them down and build up your spouse today.

Your kids are watching and see how you treat each other. The building up or tearing down, the affection or contempt will have a compound affect into your children’s future relationships. Don’t merely act on your own actions but give your children words of wisdom that can carry into the generations to come.

That’s it for this week! This one was a bit of a tangent. Let me know what you thought of it.

Talk to you soon!

~ J.P.

PS: You’ll get to know me more as this newsletter continues. Knowing and being known is a big thing for me. Feel free to reply any time with a question or comment or just to say hey.

Book Update: seriously, I have dropped the rhythm on working on this book! I’ve discovered that two additional chapters need to be written and will write those during the editing process.